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Grand Pluba |
Busted you troll! A "transexual" is someone who has already had a sex change. Get lost.
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Pluba Freshman |
crystal, i know this person, they're not a troll.
a transsexual can be either someone who's had a sex change, or someone who feels they got the wrong sex for a body. i can vouch for the fact that this person is being genuine. i told him not to use a reg'd name, for his own protection. |
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Grand Pluba |
Kitsune...maybe he/she just used the wrong term... A transexual is someone who has undergone a sex change operation. DUH! Which is something they should know if they are legit.
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| <Nat>
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I have been reading about this for some time now and the term TS is used for people who have undergone the full change AND people who's self gender does not match his/her body gender...
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Pluba Freshman |
quote: Transsexual From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. A transsexual (sometimes transexual) person establishes a permanent identity with the opposite gender to their assigned (usually at birth) sex. Transsexual men and women make or desire to make a transition from their birth sex to that of the opposite sex, with some type of medical alteration (gender reassignment therapy) to their body. The stereotypical explanation is of a "woman trapped in a man's body" or vice versa, although many in the transsexual community reject this formulation. in other words, it is defined as the feeling of being in the wrong body...also commonly referred to as "gender dysphoria" (for those of you that think it's a mental illness) a transsexual is defined both as wanting a sex change and having gone through a sex change. don't argue with me on this...i've been to meetings, workshops, conferences and open mike nights about all this kind of stuff. i'm an active member in my local gay straight alliance. transsexuals are both pre and post op individuals that feel their gender is wrong. |
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| <Rayna's Poms>
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Nat, my heart breaks for you and your misery. Please don't make any drastic permanent decision for a temporary problem (it is temporary, though you don't feel it is).
You need someone to talk to immediately - someone physically present. Though it seems like you are alone, you are not. Many people have shared your emotions and desperation - maybe not over the same issues, but most have known that feeling of utter helplessness. Let writing be your outlet. Write about what you are feeling. I am not a psychologist, but I do deal with my own depression. Think of your experiences as a way to help others. Though you don't have the successful ending yet, you can write about your journey from this feeling of despair and your ability and experiences in rising above this. Some of our greatest writers were those with 'tormented souls'. You do have at least two friends - Kitsume and me. I will do all I can from a distance to encourage you and help you. 19 is such a difficult age. You still have your whole life ahead of you. When you are feeling way down, consider that at 19, you still have 4 or more lifetimes to live. That is a lot of chances to change what you want from life. Please don't give up now. There is help available. God bless. |
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| <Nat>
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Thanks.
I had a hard night last night... I was really down and not able to put up the shields of seeming happy I have on when I am around my sister. So she keep bugging me about what was wrong... I really wanted to tell her... But I am scared and I don't know what she might feel about it... And ya my writing has been my outlet for a long time. But with my new job I am working a crap load of hour (the pay is crap) just to be able to pay my rent... So I don't have much time for it... Just not that I am out of the house a lot of this stuff is running into me full force and it's hard to deal with it all on my own... |
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Pluba Understudy |
Hello Nat,
I'm not good at advice of this sort, but I will make a small suggestion. Just register with the name Nat and I say this for your own self preservation on this board. If you don't register with a name so you can log in when you post, the trolls will eat you alive. They will use your name and post crap about you all over the place. Trust me on this. I have seen it happen to too many people on this board. And no one will know if it was really you or a troll. If you are logged in, no one else can use your identity. It's just better for you all the way around. I hope you get some good advice here. |
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Good Pluba |
Nat, I am really sorry for the way you are feeling. Maybe you should talk to your sister about it. You never know, she may want to help you. If she really loves you then she will love you for who you are. Like Rayna mentioned, don't do anything drastic. You will find happiness. You just have to look for it. I think you are on the right track by getting your GED, and making plans for College. Just live for each day. I wish you luck!
~*~Labluvr~*~ My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dogs already think I am. |
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Newba Pluba |
I want to talk to her about it...
But... How do you just tell some one some thing like this... I want it to come from me as with me living with her as I keep working this out she is bound to find out at some point... and it is better if she can get it from me first hand then from her seeing a post or some thing when she is checking her email... But I am not that good with words in person. I write how I feel better then I can say it... And my fam is all I got... If they disown me or some thing then I have nothing... |
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Good Pluba |
Maybe you should sit down and put everything in writing. You could always leave it for her to read while you are at work. That way, she would have some time to think about all of it, and absorb it. I don't know how well you can trust her to not tell your parents, but if she was willing to take you in after they kicked you out, I bet she would have enough respect for you to not say anything. You don't have any friends you can talk to, or stay with if she doesn't give you the reaction you are hoping for?
~*~Labluvr~*~ My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dogs already think I am. |
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Newba Pluba |
It's not that she really took me in after my mom and dad kicked me out.
It's more of she joined in on the plan. I did not mean it to sound like my mom and dad are asses it is more they care about me... My mom thinks I need to meet more people... She does not understand there is a lot behind me not bering able to really deal with people that much... So making me move here was kind of a hit or miss plan or forcing me to be around a lot of people to hope it breaks what ever is holding me back... Bad idea I think but they do care... I am living with my older sister as they all know there is no way in hell I'd be able to deal with stuff on my own and I need some one there to help me back up when I fall... For years that was my little brother, with out him I'd have killed my self a long time ago. But he was there for me all the time and when ever I messed up he was able to jump in and help out. That is why when I was at home I was able to deal with the pain I have better... I have only really knowen about TS stuff for a short time (near the start of this year is when I found about about this stuff and started to look into it for my self...) but I have been having the feelings for a long time (from like that age of 10-11ish is what I can remember...). Not having my back up like I am used to makes it all really hard... Writing it out is not a bad idea... But I need to think about if it is a good idea to tell her or not... I mean the more people who know about this offline the more danger I am in... |
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Good Pluba |
OK, so the real issue here is that you are a male/female, and really think that you should have been born the opposite of what you are now? Is that right? And because of this, you are not happy, and feel alone and you are afraid no one will understand. Am I understanding this correctly?
~*~Labluvr~*~ My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dogs already think I am. |
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Newba Pluba |
quote: Ya that is kind of the core of it. Then there is other stuff kind of that have come from that like not being about to be around people offline and stuff... I don't act like I look (I am a big foot ball player looking guy and I act shy and girlish...) so most people I have meet just find me odd and don't hang about to get to know me... That is why I spend most my time online as I can be who I am and people will not care how I look... |
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Good Pluba |
Is there anywhere you can go for free help? I am in Iowa, and there are businesses that offer free counseling for the first few visits. I think there are also some places that will counsel you and not charge you. I was told there way anyways. I also think it would help if you talked to someone that has been in your shoes before.
If you want to talk further, feel free to PT me anytime! ~*~Labluvr~*~ My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dogs already think I am. |
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Newba Pluba |
I have talked to some other TS online and that has helped (and backed up my feelings that I might be one).
Most free stuff about here is part of the College (The twin citys are basicly one big college town) and seeing that I am not in college yet I can't get anything... There are groups... But not really ready for some thing like that yet... |
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Good Pluba |
Well, don't give up. You have to do what makes you happy. You are an adult. Your parents and family may be unaccepting at first, but give it time. If they really love you, they will stand beside you. They don't have to agree with the decisions you make, but they can choose to stand by you no matter what. And if they don't, it is their loss because you seem like a very nice person.
~*~Labluvr~*~ My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dogs already think I am. |
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Newba Pluba |
Hm...
I have sunday off work and so does my sister... We are planing to see a movie... Maybe after on sunday night I might talk to her... Maybe not come out but get a feel for the waters... there is no need to rush it. That gives me time to work out what I will say too... |
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Good Pluba |
You will know when the right time is. You know, I just remembered watching Oprah (or was it Dr. Phil) not too long ago and something similar to this situation was on. Parents of kids were on the show, and they admitted knowing something was "not right" with their children when they were very young. You may be surprised at what your parents may already know. Anyway, good luck to you! Let me know how it goes! Have a good weekend!
~*~Labluvr~*~ My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dogs already think I am. |
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